Brock’s Worst Pick Up Lines In Pokémon, Ranked

Pokémon's Brock is infamous for using cheesy pickup lines while trying to woo the ladies. Some of his pickup lines are also infamously bad.

Brock isn’t known for holding back when he sees a pretty girl. He’s immediately all in, often without even talking to the girl first. In his quest to find love, the Pokémon Breeder-turned-Doctor in training has served up some pretty terrible pickup lines.

Whether it’s an onslaught of puns, a cheesy one-liner, or a rambling confession of love, Brock has come up with countless ways to ruin his chances. Sadly for Brock, it doesn’t work out with the ladies the majority of the time. If only there were something he could use to dry his tears… a frying pan, perhaps.

10 Brock Goes From 0 to 100 In An Instant

In “For Crying Out Loud,” Wilhomena suspects Ash and the gang of kidnapping her Marill. After grabbing Ash by the shirt and interrogating him, Brock intervenes and says they didn’t take the Pokémon.

Then, out of nowhere, Brock says, “Please tell me your name so that I may emblazon it upon my heart.” It’s hard to say what Brock is expecting when he says this to an unsuspecting girl whose Pokémon has just gone missing, but it’s unsurprising that it comes to nothing.

Brock Blabbers On About What Type Of Pokémon Nurse Joy Would Be

In an attempt to woo yet another Nurse Joy, Brock tells her about a Pokémon personality test where humans find out what Pokémon they would be based on the kind of person they are. Brock says, “You’d be a Clefairy-type Nurse Joy, or more accurately sweet and beautiful.”

Brock goes on to talk about how his friend discovered she was a Gyarados, completely oblivious to how confused and overwhelmed Nurse Joy is. Thankfully for all involved, Misty interrupts him by grabbing his ear.

Brock Lays It On Thick With Officer Jenny

In true Brock style, Brock incorporates a police pun in this particular pick-up routine. He says to Officer Jenny, “Well, wild Jenny, you’ve already got my heart in custody. Wild Brock is here to make your wildest dreams come true,” finishing with a shiny smile.

Croagunk gears up for a Poison Jab from behind, but there’s no need. Officer Jenny’s Chatot is already on the case, laying Brock out on the ground and pecking him multiple times for his untoward behavior.

Brock Hangs His Hopes On Awkward Alliteration

In “Trouble’s Brewing,” Brock deploys an onslaught of alliterative words to try and seduce Sumomo, one of the Kimono Sisters: “I declare you the most beautiful creature to ever crawl into a kimono. In plain English miss, you look rockin’ in those robes.”

On top of the awkward use of alliteration and the over-the-top compliment, Brock inadvertently likens the girl to a bug with the words “creature” and “crawl,” which is definitely not what Sumomo is going for.

Brock Presumes He’s The One Officer Jenny Is Looking For

Interrupting someone while they’re trying to work to hit on them is a sure-fire way to put them off, but that’s exactly what Brock does on this occasion. Officer Jenny is using a device to look for something, and when she says it’s picking up something, Brock chimes in with, “I bet I know what that is, a Handsome Guy Detector.”

Officer Jenny pushes Brock away and tells him not to kid himself, making it clear that he’s not the one she is looking for.

Brock Rambles On About Destiny To A Girl He Just Met

Brock instantly falls in love with Pokémornothologist Rosebay when he encounters her in the forest in “A Staravia is Born.” He says, “The most beautiful flower that can bloom in this beautiful forest, turning the landscape into a work of art. I’m Brock, now I know why I’m here, why destiny led me to this forest.”

If that weren’t enough, Brock continues on: “My whole life was in preparation for this magic moment, the moment when I would find you by my side.” Brock’s Croagunk interrupts him with a Poison Jab to his side, prompting Brock to say, “Of course, there are two sides to everything.”

Brock Explains What Each Letter In His Name Stands For

It’s hard to say whether this is a pickup line or just Brock demonstrating to a girl that he can spell. When he meets Trixie, a performer in a Pokémon circus, he says, “The name’s Brock, and here’s how you spell it: B is for Big, Brave Blastoise! R is for Rational Raichu! O is for Oddish! C is for Charizard! And K is for Konfounding Kadabra!”

After Trixie tells Brock her name, he gushes about how pretty it sounds before Misty mercifully takes him away by the ear.

Brock Gets Creepy With Nurse Joy

Brock doesn’t do himself any favors when he goes up to Nurse Joy and says, “Nurse Joy, now that you just finished examining the Pokémon, you can examine me too.” Not only does he come off as creepy, but he also insults Nurse Joy by assuming she has nothing better to do than examine him.

This particular quote is certainly one of Brock’s more creepy pickup lines, and there’s plenty to choose from in that regard. It’s no wonder Nurse Joy rebukes him.

Brock Ditches The Charm For Pure Desperation

Approaching a group of girls, Brock asks, “How would you lovely young ladies like to get together with me sometime?” Mistaking him for an old man, the girls cheerfully say, “Yes sir, that would be fun.” Brock is crestfallen, but the opportunity is too good for him to pass up.

In order to be clear that he’s looking for a date, Brock, admitting how desperate he is, sheds any notion of dignity and says, “Can I have somebody’s phone number, please? Maybe an address, email?”

Brock Used Attract, But It Failed

With what has to be one of Brock’s cheesiest lines, he says to Nurse Joy, “Do you believe in love at first sight, or shall I walk past you again?” Brock then asks Nurse Joy to smell his breath because he believes it’s as sweet as she is, but she tells him he might want a mint.

Brock is left with tears streaming down his face in the corner, presumably wishing he’d popped a mint in his mouth before opening it with such a ridiculous pickup line.

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